# Relationship VS Dart Frogs: your input!!



## erlese (Jun 11, 2008)

I have strained my relationships with women, because I chose my tank set ups and dart frogs to compromise the living space. With racks and tanks. Has your hobby and habits challenged you with keeping up with your own relationships?? Very curious to hear your experiences. What has your wife, girlfriend or boyfriend told you? Let the honesty begin!

My girlfriend dumped me :-( she couldn't take my two racks in the living room!!


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## D3monic (Feb 8, 2010)

After keeping and breeding marine fish my wife loves my frogs...not so much rouge ff's but at least the frogs don't take up ALL my spare time.

Fish had me waking up early in the morning , Feeding Mandarin fry, phyto cultures, rotifer cultures, copopods...going to work, getting home, cleaning the tanks, testing water, water changes, monitoring fish breeding, collecting eggs, getting pictures, videos, microscope shots.....ect ect oh and updating 13 fish related forums.... 


all i got to do with frogs is push a button to mist, feed every couple of days and wipe the glass off and feed the tadpoles once a week or two and dealing with only 2-3 frog related forums.

Shes much happier now


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## Azurel (Aug 5, 2010)

That sucks bro....I have been there with an old girl friend and my marine reef hobby. She didn't want me to bring it to "our" apartment but wasn't a chance in hell that was happening.

We did end up breaking up due to many issues but one was the amount of money I was spending on corals. For months before we broke up I started having problems with my reef. Algae growing out of control corals dying, little did I know is she was/had dropped pennies into the back of my rock work slowly releasing copper into my system. I didn't find that out till it was broke down and I was moving out....I am now married and the reef display was not a problem nor the money I spent on it....The reef is now a main vivarium display and she loves the frogs and don't care that I have added a rack system to the basement and many frogs soon to come....

It will get better man, atleast you still have your frogs...Maybe the next one will like the frogs and not care.


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## D3monic (Feb 8, 2010)

maybe he should start mingling at some local reptile shows....


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## james67 (Jun 28, 2008)

it can be a strain, but its also been quite helpful (for me at least) to have something to do, other than spend time with the girlfriend. gives me a nice balance that they appreciate as well. it can be hard to keep things in perspective, i know my ex loved that i had something to keep me occupied while she went and did whatever, but hated my working on anything frog related while she was around. im lucky enough to have recently found someone who appreciates my hobbies and is even planning my next tank w/ me. 

as they say, there are plenty more fish in the sea, or possibly in this case, more frogs in the forest  

james


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## Ed (Sep 19, 2004)

When we bought the house we divided up the space.. other than my office and the basement, my wife has control of the rest of the house. Since she is also a ZooKeeper that helped right from the start. 

Ed


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## salix (Mar 28, 2008)

The man I was seeing lured me into moving in with him by walling off half of his workshop, insulating it, putting in a sink and turning it into a frog room.

He's now my husband, 

To the OP, you just need to keep looking.

Deb


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## ChrisK (Oct 28, 2008)

D3monic said:


> maybe he should start mingling at some local reptile shows....


Yeah there are some extremely hot girls at those, but they're usually with guys.

I got a rule of no perfume etc in my place, imagine how well that goes over for a single dude in NY  not to mention the tanks are all in the living room so ff escapees are bound to get on them - they just gotta deal...............


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## ruthieb (Oct 18, 2010)

D3monic said:


> maybe he should start mingling at some local reptile shows....


I have three vivs in my living room and plans for one or two more. Actually four if you include my plant start tank. I want them there so I can enjoy them! 
This post reminds me of my own ex. We met while I was walking five dogs. Three were mine, the other two I was sitting for...long story short we moved in together, he complained about the dogs and after a few years we broke up. I never could figure out what it is with people who try to change their partners.
Anyway, the dogs are still here ;~)
I try to mingle at as many reptile shows as possible....!


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## SamsonsFrogs (Mar 4, 2009)

I got lucky. I had three racks in my bedroom. I guess you could have called it the frog room with a bed in it. Lol she even stated at one point that I should move all my racks to the living room so people can see the tanks and frogs. It was under a 1k square ft. apt. Still can't believe howe much stuff I had crammed into that place.

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## mordoria (Jan 28, 2011)

My GF loves the frogs. She says the tanks make her feel tropical (which is nice living in tiny apartments). I glad she supports it. If its important to you, I think your mate should enjoy it too. Maybe some are not as lucky as I but I think that if your hobby consumes a lot of your time, then you partner needs to accet that before moving into a bigger relationship. Some people raise frogs for 20+ years. Most relationships end in less then 1-2 years.


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## Kaity (Sep 18, 2010)

I think it is important to have a partner that is equally passionate about a hobby as you are so you can both do your own things. I love the frogs. My boyfriend loves metal working for HOURS on end. When he is working in his shop...I'm messing with frogs. Works out great. 

Side note: I had him babysit for a week while I was traveling and he fell in love with my Green Sips. They are the most bold frogs I have and he said he would just keep feeding them over and over so he could watch them. Moral of the story: to get your mate to like the frogs...make them babysit!


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## DJboston (Oct 25, 2008)

I get hell all the time from my fiance. When I got back into the hobby, she freaked out when I set up a third tank. Now I have 30 plus frogs and she has her own. She drove with me to frog day and had a great time, so she's obviously starting to give in and embrace the fact that I have a hobby. It's gotten 10X better than it was at first. Once she felt involved, that was the end of it.


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## SmackoftheGods (Jan 28, 2009)

You can find another girl, you can't find another hobby this awesome. Its all about priorities.... Then again, what do I know? I've been single for more than four years. If companionship is important to you, you should probably never take my advise about anything regarding your personal life :/


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## stemcellular (Jun 26, 2008)

My wife was with me when I stumbled upon a pair of mantellas a few years ago...

Not only has she been awesome about my growing collection, she actually brags about it. While she complains about the occasional flies, i really couldn't ask for a more supportive spouse. Heck, she let me run off to Peru last year and this year to CR and Panama over our anniversary. That said, I'm supportive of her work, interests, etc. Successful relationships are always predicated on balance. Be yourself and you will find someone that appreciates you not only for your interests, ie. Frogs, but for the substance that is the basis of your interests (inquisitiveness, passion, etc). Good luck


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## Groundhog (Dec 17, 2006)

Mixed feelings here:

1) I'm waay older than all of you, and you must believe that, back in the day, this was a truly chickless hobby--not unlike the "Triumph at Star Wars" skit.

2) Also, not only are most of the girls with guys, but no one seems to wear a $#@# ring. So I shall be chatting up some buxom skirt--ostensibly about agamids or epiphytes--when 10-15 minutes later, her man strolls by. I shall never get those 10-15 min back...

3) Um, is there a possibility of proportion and compromise? I mean, 8 tanks and not 80? Is it possible?

But as for sharing, remember: "A dame with a rod is like a guy with a knitting needle"--Which is another way of saying, some people really do have black thumbs.


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## erlese (Jun 11, 2008)

SmackoftheGods said:


> You can find another girl, you can't find another hobby this awesome. Its all about priorities.... Then again, what do I know? I've been single for more than four years. If companionship is important to you, you should probably never take my advise about anything regarding your personal life :/



Hahaha. " you can find another girl, you can't find another hobby" Very true!! Almost a good Dendroboard themed slogan you came up with.


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## BOOSHIFIED (Jun 23, 2009)

As with most hobbies in most cases it is not the hobby itself but the time Nd money spent on the hobby. 

If your hobby has taken over your life to where you don't have enough time to spend with "family" then maybe it is time to scale back. Loved ones want to feel MORE love then you give to your hobby.


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## erlese (Jun 11, 2008)

DJboston said:


> I get hell all the time from my fiance. When I got back into the hobby, she freaked out when I set up a third tank. Now I have 30 plus frogs and she has her own. She drove with me to frog day and had a great time, so she's obviously starting to give in and embrace the fact that I have a hobby. It's gotten 10X better than it was at first. Once she felt involved, that was the end of it.


 That's awesome!! I should have told my girl " hey.. At least my hobby is not porn" you would think out of all the guys ( and girls too  in the world that are obsessed with it. She would be proud I chose frogs instead. Ok. So there's some soft frog porn ( for non-competition breeding purposes. ;-)

I'm going to the zoo or reptile show in New England. Survey the areas. I need to Marry a zookeeper ( like Ed did) which I think is what I need. Girls that love animals are awesome!!

Love hearing your input everyone!! Seriously!! everyones experiences are unique!!


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## earthfrog (May 18, 2008)

My husband couldn't care less for the frogs' brilliant colors and patterns. The only one he likes is the blackish melanistic one. 
However, our three boys love the frogs!

I am also limited to the four frog and two plant tanks I have now. 

While we are dimetrically opposed, I love him and would never choose a frog over him. He is a rarity, a gentleman in this world of punks  I didn't marry him for his love of animals, but for his love of me.

I'd get rid of them if he asked me to. I'm also glad that he is patient enough with my tanks and FF escapees not to ban frogs completely. But soon I will have more space for frogs I think...

There is someone out there for everyone if they are patient.


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## ribbit217 (Mar 21, 2011)

Azurel said:


> That sucks bro....I have been there with an old girl friend and my marine reef hobby. She didn't want me to bring it to "our" apartment but wasn't a chance in hell that was happening.
> 
> We did end up breaking up due to many issues but one was the amount of money I was spending on corals. For months before we broke up I started having problems with my reef. Algae growing out of control corals dying, little did I know is she was/had dropped pennies into the back of my rock work slowly releasing copper into my system. I didn't find that out till it was broke down and I was moving out....I am now married and the reef display was not a problem nor the money I spent on it....The reef is now a main vivarium display and she loves the frogs and don't care that I have added a rack system to the basement and many frogs soon to come....
> 
> It will get better man, atleast you still have your frogs...Maybe the next one will like the frogs and not care.


that is one f-ed up ex!! i'm glad you found someone who can appreciate your passions!


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## ribbit217 (Mar 21, 2011)

i'm new to all this, but definitely hooked. my boyfriend just asked me yesterday if he was being replaced by frogs. lol i figure he has baseball, and i have frogs. we both find time to enjoy the other person's passion. so far... lol


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## frogface (Feb 20, 2010)

At this point in my life, I'm liking frogs more than fellas. Besides, it's only fair to leave some for the other girls.


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## rcteem (Mar 24, 2009)

If she can't accept you for who you are it's not worth it...now if she says you can have some but not 40 tanks then that's on you...I would down size 


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## sstock (Mar 12, 2009)

My wife is very supportive. She knows it makes me happy. She did not even get mad when I took the workout room and converted it to a frog room.

The mother-in-law on the other hand...


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## Allyn Loring (Sep 30, 2008)

Sometimes the frogs are just an expression of other things wrong in the relationship ---if you are willing to work on those things first than it may be a bit easier to except the frogs for them!Anyhoo my relationship is doomed so who am I to say whats good!
Allyn


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## Gumby (May 27, 2010)

I am sorry for all those who had relationships suffer due to frogs. Luckily my girlfriend tolerates all my frogs and tanks. I've warned her about how much I plan to expand and she doesn't mind. I just have to make sure I pay attention to her too. Take your significant other on a vacation and they will forget all about the collections we keep, until we find a frog on vacation


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## Freeradical53 (Jan 25, 2008)

My husband loves the frogs, but has suggested that I might be running out of room in the kitchen. He even feeds them when I'm out of town.


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## LaSelva (Nov 20, 2009)

I'm a single guy, but the frogs always seem to be a lot more of a draw than a problem. On the other hand, that might have to do with most of my frogs not actually being in my house....


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## Lukeomelas (Mar 15, 2005)

I have been down this road with a few girlfriends in the past. Relationships are all about compromise. My wife is a clean freak and when we bought our first house together the frogs were an issue. I had to downsize. My wife likes the frogs, she just doesn't like the obsessive behavior and the racks and racks of tanks. If your girl wouldn't compromise on something you love then she was no good for you anyway. Be lucky it wasn't further down the road.


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## Tadbit (Jul 16, 2010)

Not to get overly psychoanalytical, but if the frogs aren’t an unhealthy obsession (the keeper spends *ALL* time, money, and effort on the animals at the expense of all else; including a job) and the spouse or boy/girlfriend is overly critical it’s often just a metaphorical vehicle. There are deeper undercurrents of turmoil there that are the true problem. The frogs (or, often times, any hobby) are just a convenient focal point to base conflict upon, thereby expressing those dark undercurrents. 

Look for a spouse or boy/girlfriend that can be happy doing their own hobby, or sharing in yours. You both will be much happier in this kind of healthy relationship.


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## Groundhog (Dec 17, 2006)

AZUREL:

Lemme get this straight--Are you suggesting she was dropping pennies into the tank deliberately? As in, out of spite?

(I so hope the answer is no...)


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## Peter Keane (Jun 11, 2005)

Ya gotta find the right gal, I had the love of frogs for a very long time .. way before I met my wife. So, she knows her role!!.. (oops, j/k hunny, LOL).. She enjoys the frogs and now I got my daughter hooked from day 1. She was a few months old when we went to our first IAD show. I have a few frog rooms in my home. As long as I stayed out of the bedroom (with the exception of a very loud tomato frog, LOL) and living room. She was cool with it. I also keep her happy with her addictions: Coach, Dooney & Bourke handbags and Birkinstock sandals.. So, basically I purchase a new trio of lamasi and she gets a new Coach handbag.. My 6-year old daughter is also a junior herpetologist and earns her living helping Daddy in the frog rooms and making fruit flies, so if she's on my side.. her momma better be too...

Peter Keane


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## oddlot (Jun 28, 2010)

Sorry to hear that.I am fortunate that my wife was a zookeeper and loves our frogs as much as I do.We have tanks literally all over the house.I guess you would call it a frog house  She complains rarely about the occasional escapee bean beetle or ff,but she is very good about all the feeders I raise.I found the trick is to have her pick out frogs that make her happy which keeps her more interested in the hobby.I do all the work and she enjoys.I wish she could have went to frog day with me(but it probably saved me some cash lol )
Keep looking they are out there!
Lou


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## rcteem (Mar 24, 2009)

Glad to see that I'm not the only single person who has had issues with their exs over this. I can down size to three tanks but never going to be 100% with out my frogs.

Maybe someone should start a PDF online dating site...lol


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## ruthieb (Oct 18, 2010)

rcteem said:


> Glad to see that I'm not the only single person who has had issues with their exs over this. I can down size to three tanks but never going to be 100% with out my frogs.
> 
> Maybe someone should start a PDF online dating site...lol
> 
> ...


 Where do I sign up?


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## erlese (Jun 11, 2008)

rcteem said:


> Glad to see that I'm not the only single person who has had issues with their exs over this. I can down size to three tanks but never going to be 100% with out my frogs.
> 
> Maybe someone should start a PDF online dating site...lol
> 
> ...



How's this for an ad " SWM w/ PDF & 5 VIVS seeking SWF who loves PDF. not into S&M w/ BMW... Lol.. Ok.. Just scratch that!! LoL


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## rcteem (Mar 24, 2009)

erlese said:


> How's this for an ad " SWM w/ PDF & 5 VIVS seeking SWF who loves PDF. not into S&M w/ BMW... Lol.. Ok.. Just scratch that!! LoL


To funny


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## EricIvins (Jan 4, 2010)

The whole Reptile thing in general has me going through an upcoming Divorce.......It was doomed to fail anyway, but that was the quick way out ( read excuse ) for her.......

The one I have now could care less about what I keep......She supports me in what ever I do, and I couldn't ask for more.......When she gets crapped on by what ever she wants to handle at the moment, she's a Trooper about it..........


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## AaronAcker (Aug 15, 2007)

erlese said:


> How's this for an ad " SWM w/ PDF & 5 VIVS seeking SWF who loves PDF. not into S&M w/ BMW... Lol.. Ok.. Just scratch that!! LoL


That's great LOL. 

My first go around w/ dart frogs was put to a halt about 5 years ago by my then girlfriend. *Unfortunately I put her first. Now many "moons" later, I'm with an amazing woman, who loves all animals (including snakes) and she actually helps with the business. * Score!


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## erlese (Jun 11, 2008)

AaronAcker said:


> That's great LOL.
> 
> My first go around w/ dart frogs was put to a halt about 5 years ago by my then girlfriend. *Unfortunately I put her first. Now many "moons" later, I'm with an amazing woman, who loves all animals (including snakes) and she actually helps with the business. * Score!


 Very cool Aaron. BTW. Same thing happened. We Broke up and i left for Germany ( I'm jealous... In a good way for your new found mate! )I guess I have to date girls I see at the conventions.

I'm still in Boston. I have to finish my (slave labour ) Research and marketing with Pfizer. Leave in 2 weeks. ( I have not forgotten about the 20 gallon kits) when I get back. I'm ordering 3 of them!! I saw your kits a DJBoston house.. Nice work!!


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## AaronAcker (Aug 15, 2007)

cool. have fun w/ the slave labor, know the feeling.


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## zzpop102 (Apr 24, 2010)

I saw this thread so I decided to ask my girlfriend what she thought of my frogs. She said she likes them and finds them intresting. She also said she is just glad I have a hobby and that it is a legal one haha. That works for me


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## GRIMM (Jan 18, 2010)

Haha I've completely given up trying to find someone that finds what I do interesting or appreciates the passion I have for it. I always get the old.."Oh yeaaaahhh, thats c-cool...". lmao whatever :S


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## erlese (Jun 11, 2008)

GRIMM said:


> Haha I've completely given up trying to find someone that finds what I do interesting or appreciates the passion I have for it. I always get the old.."Oh yeaaaahhh, thats c-cool...". lmao whatever :S


Dude...That's hilarious!!! I bet when you are trying to explain something. Or expressing your passion in detail To those who really don't understand ( or not in the hobby)

Its that same blank stare as I get when they say.." oh wow... that's.. That's nice.. It's so green" when their tone is really saying " I don't get it.. It's frogs"


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## Steve25 (Jan 29, 2010)

Lol to above 2 posts ^

I'm in the same situation. I've had them like the whole tropical look but once they figure out how much work and money is invested they are like thats's c-coool.

I'd love to find a zoologist 

+1 for dating website


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## ruthieb (Oct 18, 2010)

Love the last two posts! 
It's getting kind of old always hearing the "that's c-coool" myself....let alone the "I don't get what the attraction is" 
I gave up a while ago....oh wait, I've gotta go! Im meeting someone about a tank they're selling - 55 gallon on a wrought iron stand. $40.00!
Now that's a date I can't pass up


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## DJboston (Oct 25, 2008)

I just never cared what kind of hobby I was into or figured it into how woman would react. Honestly, you either have game or you don't lol 

Just kidding guys...sort of lol I guess what I mean is that woman like confidence. But they don't understand guys and hobbies so you have to definitely play it right.

Men's have hobbies. A woman's hobby is herself. Hair, nails, cloths. They invest in themselves and the only return is a constant battle between other women who do the same lol 

Obviously there are exceptions and some woman aren't like that and have hobbies, even frogs. But in the dating world, especially in your 20s, it's really apparent. 

Maybe I got lucky. The first date for anyone is usually such a false event. You don't go on the date, you basically send a representative of yourself and it's totally fake and contrived. When I met my fiance, it was the first time I just acted like myself. In 3 years we've barely been apart a single day. Best friends. I think I just got lucky and if something feels forced and you have to drop your hobbies, you'll never be happy with this person in the long run. You also need to know that even if she supports your hobby, often to keep an even keel, you need to play it off like it's not a huge deal and just enjoy spending time with her. As long as my frogs are cared for, I always take days where I take care of my frogs for 15 minutes, then totally drop internet and any talking about frogs. When I do that, it's usually her that says something like, "hey was that your vittatus calling??" or "wow your bassleri are growing fast!" lol 

True story.


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## leuc11 (Nov 1, 2010)

I dont bother but im 15  All my friends that are girls that see me on dendroboard just call me a dork so no luck there  and my best bud just goes are you done talking yet when i'm explaining things to him of course its an exageration because he goes JK but it still pi$$es me off other then that no one really finds it interesting and GRIMM I get the same thing to ( them frog haters)


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## M_Rybecky (Mar 16, 2009)

My boyfriend doesnt like my frogs, but hes happy that I have my own hobby. He calls me a geek and hates going to the shows with me. I bribed my cousin to go to frog day with a trip to IHOP. His hobby is his racecar, I love cars and racing so I guess that I share his hobby with him. But when its time to take care of the frogs I vanish for a few hours... he enjoys the peace and quiet. I would probably drive him crazy if I didnt have my frogs and he knows it!


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## skylsdale (Sep 16, 2007)

D3monic said:


> After keeping and breeding marine fish my wife loves my frogs...


Same here.


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## VivariumWorks (Feb 27, 2008)

Yea I think I'm going to try something a little different than most of what you guys have been saying... because the last few relationships and dates have been with people I met in the reptile hobby... and yea... they were all crazy. And not in the "fun" way either. I mean I've been called that a few times myself with some of the more ridiculous things I've done "in the name of science", but seriously... I think I'll be OK if my next few dates say something like "oh thats nice or c-cool".

Just wanting to meet a normal chick. I mean what IS it with these San Antonio women?

Oh your interesting and hot, but you've got a coke problem... 

You're neat and fun, but are jobless,degreeless with zero ambition...

You're a cute one, but are "vegan" and force yourself to hurl in public at a black-tie event after eating a gyro and curse my name mid gags for not warning her it had lamb. Its a gyro. Duh! (Besides she didn't tell me she was vegan, because wouldn't have asked her out!)

Oooh ooh my favorite was the one who looked normal but turned out to have full body tattoos all across her chest, back, and legs. EVERYTHING pierced and had Tourette Syndrome. That got entertaining quick. LOL

So yea, I'm taking myself OUT of the dating pool because I can take a room full of women and find the ONE insane one and try and date her. At this point I think its just me.

Besides, girlfriends are expensive, and new rock molds don't break into your house steal your lab notebook, swim-trunks, and robe. (Yea thats all she took. Like I said, crazy chicks.)


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## M_Rybecky (Mar 16, 2009)

VivariumWorks said:


> Yea I think I'm going to try something a little different than most of what you guys have been saying... because the last few relationships and dates have been with people I met in the reptile hobby... and yea... they were all crazy. And not in the "fun" way either. I mean I've been called that a few times myself with some of the more ridiculous things I've done "in the name of science", but seriously... I think I'll be OK if my next few dates say something like "oh thats nice or c-cool".
> 
> Just wanting to meet a normal chick. I mean what IS it with these San Antonio women?
> 
> ...


I wasnt going to quote the whole thing... but... Its all pretty damn funny! I'm sorry for your horrible experences. I'm sure you'll find a good one if you stop looking  We arent all that crazy.


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## WendySHall (Aug 31, 2010)

I always find that people at first look at me like I'm a little strange and just nod their heads when they hear about my frogs. But, later...when they are actually AT my house and SEE my frogs they become quite interested. Lots of fascination and questions then! 

When I first got started in this, my husband (of course) simply humored me and shook his head when he heard I spent a couple hundred on this pair or that pair. He was fascinated though when I talked about them...loved how I got so excited! As time went by, he slowly became more and more interested in them himself. He still wouldn't put the money into it that I would (if I had it), but now...he's trying to take over! He's been stealing my imitator eggs and raising them himself!!! He's very much into all of the eggs and tads and calls them his babies and checks them every morning before work and every night when he gets home. 

Can't ask for more than that!


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## David Becher (Feb 10, 2010)

Rc-"If she can't accept you for who you are it's not worth it...now if she says you can have some but not 40 tanks then that's on you...I would down size "


Depends on how she herself is, weigh your options, form a sort of... bargaining with her and think, well shes an 8/10 on my list, so I should deserve a few more tanks. Something like that. Jk haha If shes right for you, youll know it, and most likely she wont care, if she did shed love ya enough to pretend not to, then hang around you enough to be infected by the dendrobatid. Good Luck!


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## eldalote2 (Jun 3, 2009)

WendySHall said:


> When I first got started in this, my husband (of course) simply humored me and shook his head when he heard I spent a couple hundred on this pair or that pair. He was fascinated though when I talked about them...loved how I got so excited! As time went by, he slowly became more and more interested in them himself. He still wouldn't put the money into it that I would (if I had it), but now...he's trying to take over! He's been stealing my imitator eggs and raising them himself!!! He's very much into all of the eggs and tads and calls them his babies and checks them every morning before work and every night when he gets home.
> 
> Can't ask for more than that!


So cute! 

My fiance likes the frogs, he just doesn't know much about them. 

He is however, completely in love with my Hog Island Boa. After I bought her, she was at his house within the month and lived with him an hour and a half away. He got to name her Madrid (Maddy) because Spain won the World Cup. They both just moved back in. I call her his Princess.


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## Froggywv (Aug 9, 2010)

Yeah... we aren't all like that. I promise there are some sane women out there who actually like animals. I have dogs, cats, horses, fish and FROGS. My husband likes them, but I don't tell him what I spend on them. If he knew what I spent on my pair of wild caught cobalts, he would freak... And now I'm getting our 5 year old into it. He's doomed... LOL 

Course, I had to tolerate 500 + tarantulas in the apartment, including a few LARGE ones that got loose, and a smaller one that was loose for over a month... I found it... and I'm a bit arachnophobic...


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## erlese (Jun 11, 2008)

VivariumWorks said:


> Yea I think I'm going to try something a little different than most of what you guys have been saying... because the last few relationships and dates have been with people I met in the reptile hobby... and yea... they were all crazy. And not in the "fun" way either. I mean I've been called that a few times myself with some of the more ridiculous things I've done "in the name of science", but seriously... I think I'll be OK if my next few dates say something like "oh thats nice or c-cool".
> 
> Just wanting to meet a normal chick. I mean what IS it with these San Antonio women?
> 
> ...


ok..... seriously...you know what!! ( picture this) I am in a meeting with four Doctors and seven Registered Nurses. I pulled open my iphone, looked at this post, and seriously busted up!! .. the room all draws their eyes to me, some not pleased)... thanks. I have to change my white lab coat. coffee....HOLY FUNNY!! 

yeah. I have given up on chicks!! agreed!! ( i could be in a room with huge group of smart, great personality, intelligent attractive women who are just down right AWESOME!!!) but all of these are either taken, or the other side of the country.

all the ones i seem to attract are either young enough to send me into a statutory weekend, or old enough to be my Grandma who want to cheat on their husbands. They either want a sugar daddy, stick the " white powder up their little button noses" or " comparing each other to why they so look good from either eating less or just barfing more" and my frogs and 5 vivarium setups are an issue because???

LMFAO over the vegan thing. This girl told me "why Pork tastes so bad no matter how you cook it". after 20 minutes of back and forth, and i was fed up with being an " animal killer" i was like " tammy, i think pork tastes so bad because you need to take off the rubber, before you taste the meat" LOL I brought this chick home . everything seemed normal until she opened her mouth. ( her entire tounge was tattooed and pierced ) she was like " oh.. those frogs are so sweet" but when it came time to come up close to the tanks. then the famous... "EEWW" came out. yep. my IQ just dropped 10 points. I GIVE UP!! 

if I see a girl kiss a frog. shes the one im going to marry. because thats exactly what I am.


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## VivariumWorks (Feb 27, 2008)

" tammy, i think pork tastes so bad because you need to take off the rubber, before you taste the meat" 

LOL Thats hilarious! Yea that one is going to get me into trouble if I remember it. I just know it.

Sorry about the white coat, but what the heck are you doing surfing dendroboard in a doctors meeting?


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## erlese (Jun 11, 2008)

VivariumWorks said:


> " tammy, i think pork tastes so bad because you need to take off the rubber, before you taste the meat"
> 
> LOL Thats hilarious! Yea that one is going to get me into trouble if I remember it. I just know it.
> 
> Sorry about the white coat, but what the heck are you doing surfing dendroboard in a doctors meeting?


 well, hopefully you will not get into too much trouble. LOL

the meeting was almost over. I was just so bored. They were going on and on about data research, drug interaction ( peak, onset and duration of an HIV medication therapy)... ect.. so kept the phone underneathe the table. and read your comment. the funny part was. An older Dr in his 70s afterwards was like (who BTW doesnt own a cell phone) says " why did you think your crotch was funny??".....OK... time to retire DOC


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## ruthieb (Oct 18, 2010)

Why is it so difficult for anyone I date to appreciate the excitement I feel when setting up new fly cultures???
Maybe I should save that for the second date...I don't know, what do you think?

Seriously, what's a girl got to do....


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## erlese (Jun 11, 2008)

well.. maybe we can go out for coffee and we can talk flies  we can show each other our fly Clutures ;-).... ( i hope i dont get banned for that comment)

I think if you cant show off your cultures, then those guys dont know what their missing!!


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## karag (May 12, 2005)

Well that would be your sign if the relationship will work or not. 
Lucky to have a wife who like dart frogs and chameleon. I have roaches too and she hates those, where we came from they are considered as pest.


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## ruthieb (Oct 18, 2010)

erlese said:


> well.. maybe we can go out for coffee and we can talk flies  we can show each other our fly Clutures ;-).... ( i hope i dont get banned for that comment)
> 
> I think if you cant show off your cultures, then those guys dont know what their missing!!



Now that's what I'm talking about....I'm so proud of my cultures!!


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## Chris Miller (Apr 20, 2009)

It's all about balance and having a partnership. My GF cleans jars and makes cultures. I watch every show on tv that has a baby in it. 

She loves how excited I get about frogs. I love how excited she gets about (other peoples for now) babies.


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## choco (May 1, 2009)

As a girl who has the frogs (and other miscellaneous pets in the house) I have to say it was actually harder to find a guy who was tollerant of my growing critter collection. As it is, we have a three bedroom house, one of which is my own office, where the majority of my collection resides. My show tank ( a 360 degree view tank with bastis) takes up a portion of the living room next to the fire place, so we can view it all the way around. As is, my partner enjoys all of my tanks as works of art that require minimal care once set up. As to escaping fruit flies, all but one of my tanks is set up to be primarily fruit fly escape proof. There is a joy to screen mesh from REI, super fine, and even keeps spring tales in (for holes located near the floor).

Good times 

I do say, when looking for a gal, that perhaps you should try to find a tomboy, or one who enjoys snakes/worms/frogs in general on her own, 'cause I know I do.


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## angry gary (Dec 9, 2009)

like some have said before. those who have significant others that leave you because of your hobby were doomed long before PDF's. the frogs are just an easy excuse and tangible thing to focus on.
someone once told me when i was young that a healthy relationship is mostly based on you being happy when your spouse is happy. i get great joy when i see my wife smiling and happy whether it is watching TV or doing one of our hobbies. my wife has been involved in every hobby and addictive activities i have been involved with. metal detecting, beer can collecting, reef tanks, breweriana collecting, firearms, ( she has her own guns!) and now PDF's. she has her favorite frogs and enjoys just watching them all the time. she doesn't care for making cultures but thats okay.
and my advice for the single people is to not "drop" your pdf hobby into their laps after the fact. you must show them that is who you are, like your family and job. a package deal. 

AG


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## ryan10517 (Oct 23, 2010)

i'm just plain bad with relationships. Every single gf i have had has either cheated on me, completely replaced me (with my best friend), or used me to get back at another one of their ex's, plus all of them have lied to my face about it haha. I guess that's what i get for dating in highschool. 

I really cant believe how many people don't know what PDF's are! i was talking to a girl the other day and she had no idea what they even where! She was like "so what do you do with them? Are they like food or something?" I swear the only girls that ever talk to me are either complete idiots, or really ugly, fat, and obnoxious. I have the worst luck. At least my frogs like me..... wait, never mind, they don't....


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## PeanutbuttER (Jan 1, 2011)

My wife knows that i put my foot down on the frogs and that they are not going anywhere but where they are now. In return I don't constantly ask her if I can get more (she hates feeling like I spend more time thinking about hobbies than being thoughtful about her...). We have an understanding on this.

That said, if it really came down to her or the frogs I don't think I'd even have a hard time deciding what to do. I didn't marry my frogs after all


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## sports_doc (Nov 15, 2004)

erlese said:


> I have strained my relationships with women,.....
> 
> My girlfriend dumped me :-( she couldn't take my two racks in the living room!!


David, that one would have left you sooner or later anyway 

Enjoy the hobby, it wont get bored of ya 

[teasing of course....]


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## sports_doc (Nov 15, 2004)

ruthieb said:


> Why is it so difficult for anyone I date to appreciate the excitement I feel when setting up new fly cultures???
> Maybe I should save that for the second date...I don't know, what do you think?
> 
> Seriously, what's a girl got to do....



Ruth meet David, David meet Ruth.....

my job here is done


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## ruthieb (Oct 18, 2010)

sports_doc said:


> Ruth meet David, David meet Ruth.....
> 
> my job here is done


Thank you for making blush in front of the entire board, Shawn 



So anyway...how's it going David?


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## Chris Miller (Apr 20, 2009)

sports_doc said:


> Ruth meet David, David meet Ruth.....
> 
> my job here is done


Way to go Yenta. Don't think they can leave you feedback for the services you just provided.


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## ruthieb (Oct 18, 2010)

Chris Miller said:


> Way to go Yenta. Don't think they can leave you feedback for the services you just provided.


We can't? 
Ohhh man...I guess everyone could just PM me.

"Yenta" = too funny!


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## mainbutter (Sep 2, 2010)

I hit the jackpot and found a girlfriend who, once introduced to herpetoculture, became nearly as crazy about it as I am.

We both love animals and love keeping them as pets. She came from a background of dogs, horses, and small mammals, and I came from a background of primarily reptiles and fish. We've just widened each others' world, and never argue about not having enough space for the animals and their cages, because they are all OUR animals!

We recently received some awesome orange isopod and springtail cultures from Pumilo, and I think that my gf was even more excited about bugs than I was. I feel incredibly lucky.

Now, arguing over the overflowing amount of fishing equipment and tackle, and where to store it.. that's a different issue


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## DJboston (Oct 25, 2008)

While the compromise is something I would done anyway with our living situation, it just shows what a cool chick I have. She could of said 4 tanks but knew I wanted to have a varied collection when getting back into the hobby and agreed to the rack system. She's the best! We're best friends and do everything together. If she hated my hobby, I wouldn't be able to enjoy doing it. She's always known a lot about animals and when we met in 2008, she knew I liked frogs and herpetology so wasn't surprised when I got back into it last year. She actually knew some common names when I met her and her favorite was my favorite (Blue Jeans). 

If you see my join date here, I left the hobby in 2004-5 I believe, and came to the forum in October 2008. I was all set and ready to go with getting back into dart frogs like I am now. I was single, out of college, and had the extra cash to do so. Then BAM, a friend tells her at work to text me and see if I wanted to chat some time. She liked my picture in his phone I guess. The next week we go out on a coffee date for an hour, and then the night after that we go out for drinks and have been together ever since. This happened a couple of days after Halloween. I had found a guy on the forum to make me custom acrylic tank units and a couple of old friends in the hobby to buy some of my first new frogs from. But once I met her we were head over heals for each other and any of my interests in frogs at the time were not even a thought in my mind. I was on a cloud as that's what happens when you first fall in love. So when I joined and had HUGE plans as a single man, it quickly changed and I vanished until September 2010 when I started setting up a tank and now I'm finally a serious hobbyist again. 

With our 8 week old newborn son Quinton, we're very busy but closer than ever and having a blast. Many regular people asked me if the frog thing would interfere with being a father when the baby came, and we both agreed that NOT A CHANCE. I mean how long does it really take to maintain a medium sized dart frog collection daily or be a part of the hobby? It's easy once you have it down to what works. It's no different than a new father having any other hobby. I told this to my father and he said that it's a baby, not rocket science. He is a huge sports fan, high school football coach, and everything that goes along with that. My parents had 4 children that are now 22, 26,28(me) and 31. He said when we were born that he still did everything he usually did and it wasn't much of a lifestyle change. Since I mostly just hang out with my fiance for fun, the only thing that has changed is that I am very HAPPY so I'm a better hobbyist, father, partner, and worker. 

While I did add frogs, tanks, art project side business, etc. really really fast in my 8 months back in the hobby all while getting engaged and having a first son, I couldn't be happier and I have the energy and it feels easy to me. With frogs, I knew very early on my short term goals and long term goals I still have. It's like riding a bike. 

She actually resisted for a bit but is now a pretty intelligent frogger. Not just that she watched me and knows what's going on....but she can spot health issues, name dozens of latin names and knows how the genus and species thing works. Plus she even knows about the former taxonomy. The surprising thing that I've noticed is that she has quickly picked up subtle things in the hobby that only a trained eye can see....to a new hobbyist, tinc morphs might be pretty daunting and confusing if it's brand new to them. But she can tell see a picture I'm looking at on the forum and say, "Oh that's a nice Oyapok tinc." I'm like, "what the..." 

First latin name she learned from a book was Bufo bufo. As a inside joke between the two of us, she always says it in a weird voice whenever a toad is mentioned. Matt Mirabelli was talking to us at a table inside the hotel the night before frog day. We were talking about wild caught frogs and something came up with Devin Edmonds Madagascar talk and I had mentioned all the Boophis spp. tree frogs all of a sudden coming into hobby...of course she said Bufo bufo under her breath in a weird voice. Completely random and Matt kind of glanced over with a confused look on his face. lol

D


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## erlese (Jun 11, 2008)

ruthieb said:


> Thank you for making blush in front of the entire board, Shawn
> 
> 
> 
> So anyway...how's it going David?


in the third person narrative..**** as David is a bit nervous and shy.. He straightens out..his shirt , drinks a glass of water to calm his nerves.. Keeps thinking of the song " Match maker, Match maker" brought on by Shawn ;-)

The Comdey-geek-nerd David replies to Ruthieb:

Umm.. im Not bad!!! And you??.. So...so... How bout them redsocks.. ... Lol... Joke... Seriously.. I'm doing well. Finishing up my nursing Stint in Boston. I can't wait to get home to my tanks. ( ANY FLIES) Seattle is a very nice city! I am up there on occasion.

What frogs are you working with at the moment?? Let's talk cultures too


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## erlese (Jun 11, 2008)

DJboston said:


> While the compromise is something I would done anyway with our living situation, it just shows what a cool chick I have. She could of said 4 tanks but knew I wanted to have a varied collection when getting back into the hobby and agreed to the rack system. She's the best! We're best friends and do everything together. If she hated my hobby, I wouldn't be able to enjoy doing it. She's always known a lot about animals and when we met in 2008, she knew I liked frogs and herpetology so wasn't surprised when I got back into it last year. She actually knew some common names when I met her and her favorite was my favorite (Blue Jeans).
> 
> If you see my join date here, I left the hobby in 2004-5 I believe, and came to the forum in October 2008. I was all set and ready to go with getting back into dart frogs like I am now. I was single, out of college, and had the extra cash to do so. Then BAM, a friend tells her at work to text me and see if I wanted to chat some time. She liked my picture in his phone I guess. The next week we go out on a coffee date for an hour, and then the night after that we go out for drinks and have been together ever since. This happened a couple of days after Halloween. I had found a guy on the forum to make me custom acrylic tank units and a couple of old friends in the hobby to buy some of my first new frogs from. But once I met her we were head over heals for each other and any of my interests in frogs at the time were not even a thought in my mind. I was on a cloud as that's what happens when you first fall in love. So when I joined and had HUGE plans as a single man, it quickly changed and I vanished until September 2010 when I started setting up a tank and now I'm finally a serious hobbyist again.
> 
> ...


This is awesome!!!! Loved this!!! You have a great life!!! No question!!


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## erlese (Jun 11, 2008)

sports_doc said:


> David, that one would have left you sooner or later anyway
> 
> Enjoy the hobby, it wont get bored of ya
> 
> [teasing of course....]



No doubt about that!! ;-) I even asked her if it was the Size of the frogs that bothered her. She said" baby. Im not hung up on size. Just how many ;-) .. Bad joke.. 


On a serious note though. The hobby has really pulled me through. Everyone ( and I mean everyone on Dendroboard has been very cool!! Easy to talk too! And it's helped me over heart break. And yes.. I will pay homage to the dendroboard girls in a 
non-sexual-descrimination-i-could-go-to-court- kind of way. You girls are bad ass!! Easy to talk too. Smart, and funny. 

I love the ideas. Things I'm learning. I'm learning more now, then when I started n 2007.


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## nawth21 (Apr 17, 2008)

It's a never ending battle. There's only so much space to go around and it's a duel between the frog tanks and the reef tanks LOL but seriously we're both huge nerds with our respective hobbies and we have the electric bill to prove it. And I even get a frog room in the next place.


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